Episode 38 - "None of the Above"

Part 1: Part 2: Part 3: Part 4: Part 5:

Plot

The episode begins in Dawson's bedroom, marking the return of this technique for the first time this season. Eve and Dawson are together trying to enjoy Movie Night, but much to Dawson's dismay, they are not watching a movie, but the television show Felicity. While they debate over this issue, Eve draws the conclusion that Dawson is Felicity, only real, citing that he has the perfect hair and skin, and is in general, the hero. Dawson disagrees saying that television is too contrived and that the characters make no imperfect or bad choices. Eve all the while is seducing Dawson, and just as they are to get cozy, Dawson comments about how this is where television would cut to a commercial, and the opening sequence rolls.

Joey awakens after having a nightmare involving her missing the PSAT. The entire gang is caught up in the preparation for the test that we learn will take place the following Saturday. Andie is as usual in full swing, preparing herself 24/7, Jack and Jen quiz one another on vocabulary terms, and Dawson makes intelligent commentary at the after school PSAT study session. The only member of the gang who isn't caught up in pre-test preparation is Pacey, who has returned to his less than studious days. A fiery run-in between Pacey and Andie in the hall show that both are still angry at one another in the post-breakup stage in their relationship.

Capeside's Principal Green calls Joey aside after the PSAT study session, telling her that if she performs well on the test, she could win a national merit scholarship. Joey replies that she knows this, and comments on how much pressure is riding on this exam. Principal Green advises her to take the night off, to relax and get her mind off of the test, assuring her that everyone knows she will do just fine. Joey approaches Dawson in the hallway and asks if they can rent a movie to shake her pre-test jitters. He agrees, but when he finds out that she wants to do something with him that evening, he replies that he already has plans with Eve, but invites her along. Joey balks at the idea and walks away. She then asks her boss at the docks, Rob, for Friday night off to study for the test. He agrees, and then asks her if she would like to go out with him on Friday night. After some joking responses to his question, she turns him down.

Meanwhile, Jack is having his own problems of sorts with the football team. While running the line (in football, when each player runs through a line of all the other players, the goal is to get through without being knocked down), he is convinced that his teammates are singling him out because he is gay. Coach Mitch doesn't buy this, and tells him that they are just treating him like the new guy. Jack complains about his situation to Jen, while she bandages his sore ribs. When he talks about wanting to quit the team, Jen tells him that quitting is not the answer, and convinces him to stay on the team.

Eve appears at Dawson's window later that night with an apple. They make some flirting biblical references and begin talking outside his window on the rooftop. When the conversation turns to Dawson and Joey, Eve reveals that she to had a boy next store, her father's military commanding officer. Before Dawson can react to that statement, she gives him something else of shock value. A sealed copy of a completed and 100% correct PSAT. As the scene fades out, Dawson ponders what to do with the test.

Dawson huddles the gang together at the next PSAT review session and shows them his still unopened copy of the PSAT that Eve gave him. When asked about the origin of the exam, Dawson keeps quiet, but Joey makes some biting comments on how it was Eve. Before opening the exam, Pacey and Andie throw insults at each other, and Joey says some additional unkind words about Dawson's character. Dawson tells the gang that they could all use the exam for their own reasons - Jack because he hasn't been able to study because of football practice, Andie to ensure her acceptance to Harvard, Joey for the merit-scholarship, Pacey because he just doesn't care about school anymore, and Dawson because of his new sexual preoccupation. Before they can do anything with the exam, Principal Green shows up and tells the to sit down and be quiet. A few seconds later, the fire alarm sounds, and Dawson is cornered by Principal Green, and is forced to leave the test on the table before exiting the building. When the gang returns to their seats, the test is gone. Panic strikes everyone in the group but Pacey.

Back at the docks, Joey makes an error while filling a boat with gas. Rob's response is to take away her night off. When she calls him on this, telling him that she knows that he is doing this just because she turned down his offer for a date, he walks away saying he doesn't know what she is talking about.

Eve watches as Dawson searches for the test later that night in the library. She tells him that the test isn't going to be there, and that someone took it. When Dawson says it could be any of the students in the room, Eve counters him, saying that one of his friends took the test. Joey awakens from another nightmare, this time in Principal Green's office, where he confronts the gang and demands to find out who took the test. She awakens just as she is pulling the fire alarm in her dream. Dawson calls the group together once again, this time to ask who took the test. Joey and Dawson get into another heated debate about his moral character, and how Dawson would never have done any of this if it had not been for Eve. Dawson tells the gang that he will leave his locker open, and for the guilty party to return it there. Pacey argues that this will never happen, and Dawson says that it will if the person wants to do the right thing.

Andie calls Pacey aside after the meeting. She hands him a box containing tee-shirts, baseball caps, a stuffed Dumbo, and pictures of the two of them together. Andie tells him that she is getting her life in order, and that she is returning everything he ever gave her. When Pacey asks if she doesn' t even want memories, she replies that she especially doesn't want those, and that if he doesn't want to be part of her life, he gets nothing. He walks away with his things, clearly hurt.

Henry works with Jack at football practice, telling him that he needs to concentrate on a word and focus on that and only that while running the line. When Jack questions why Henry is being so nice to him, Henry replies that it is because Jack is gay. He's gay and he has ties to a certain female we all know and hate, Jen. Henry is completely smitten with Jen and asks if Jack can help him get a date with her. Jack laughs at this favor, citing that Henry is a freshman, and that there is no way that he will be able to get together with Jen. A drunk Pacey shows up at Joey's dock, clutching his box of Andie memories. As he tells Joey about his situation, he falls flat on his face, spilling the contents of the box into the creek. As Joey goes to call his father and tell him that he is there, he reaches over to grab the photograph of him and Andie together, and inadvertently drops it into the water.

Eve and Dawson arrive at the school at the end of the day. Eve is sure that the test will not be in Dawson's locker, but Dawson disagrees, saying that he knows his friends and that they will have done the right thing. When he opens up his locker, he sees that he is wrong, as the test is not there. Eve tells him that she knows who took the test. She says that whoever took the test was the person who would have had the most to gain, and that whoever took it, was probably his best friend.

An angry Dawson shows up at the dock and immediately accuses Pacey of taking the test. A still semi-drunk Pacey angrily denies the charges and turns the tables on Dawson. Dawson replies that Pacey is the only person who could have taken the test. Pacey then calls Dawson a "self-righteous son of a bitch who cares more about his rose colored defunct 1950's belief system than the people who fail to live up to it." Dawson replies that Pacey is a son-of-a-bitch who turned away his girlfriend after she begged him to forgive her. Pacey comments that at least he didn't send Andie's father to jail, and Dawson replies that he didn't make Joey go insane. Pacey replies with a quick blow to the left, and Dawson then punches Pacey in the lip - knocking him on the ground. Joey then emerges telling Dawson that he's got to stop his behavior, while aiding to Pacey. Dawson then stares in shock at his fist and what he has done to his best friend.

Joey and Pacey share a touching moment together where Pacey talks about how hurt he is that Dawson would brand him as a cheater, and asks when one starts believing the general consensus about himself. Joey replies that one only does that when the consensus is true. Joey urges him to talk to Dawson, because Dawson will eventually do what is right.

Eve catches Dawson as he returns home from his fight with Pacey. When she sees Dawson's black eye and inquires as to what happened, he reams her out, saying that she happened and that she has changed him. When she backfires saying that she is just being honest, and once again tries to seduce him, he tells her that now that he knows her, he doesn't like her, and walks away. At football practice, Jack decides to use the word "fug" while running the line. His run is a success and he is met by the cheers of his teammates, his coach, and the cheerleaders. A love-struck Henry catches site of Jen, and runs towards the cheerleaders and past Jen screaming "Fug, fug". A bewildered Jen watches him.

It is now Saturday, and right as Principal Green is about to start the test, Dawson stands up and turns in his blank exam sheet, and walks out of the room. Pacey soon follows, and the two walk and talk together away from the school. They have made up. At the very end of the episode, the camera focuses in on the culprit who stole and is now using the test... Andie!

Originally Aired Wednesday, Oct. 13, 1999

Great Lines

Dawson: Actually, now that I've gotten to know you, I don't really like you.

Eve: TV is just like a movie, except shorter, and with built in bathroom breaks and a new sequel every week.
Dawson: Sequels I hate on principle.
Eve: Suit yourself, I'm hooked.

Pacey: Whether or not I can forgive you, Andie, is not going to be what keeps us apart. What you did... Our relationship was like this beautiful thing, and I don't think you ever realized how powerful it was. You changed my life, Andie, you were that person for me. You inspired me to be a man that I'd only ever dreamt about being. When you first started to get sick, it dawned on me that I might not be that person for you. I can never go back to loving you the way I did knowing that my love wasn't strong enough the first time around. I could always forgive you, Andie, but I will never forget.

Rob: Well uh, here's a thought. You let me take you out for a post-PSAT celebration. Saterday night, you and me.
Joey: Thanks but, husband doesn't really like me seeing other people.
Rob: Oh, sure, I thought you were going to say you had to wash your hair.
Joey: No, that's Wednesday's. Actually Rob, the truth is, I'm a lesbian.
Rob: Really? Anyone I know?

Dawson: First things first, movie nights we're supposed to watch movies.

Dawson: You know what else I hate about television? They always cut to commercial at the best part. (Theme song)

Dawson: What took you so long?
Pacey: Eh, it was those analogies man, they're a killer... remind me why we just did that again?
Dawson: Because if we're going to beat the crap out of each other, it should at least be over a chick.

Joey: Once again, Dawson Leery proves the groin is mightier than the brain.

Joey: Morals to Dawson, come in Dawson.

Pacey: Hello, Mr. Dock.

Joey: How would you know what I need?
Pacey: You're probably right. I'm sure I don't have any idea what you're going through. How are it is to let someone go. How painful it must be to know that as right as you two are for each other, it doesn't mean you're right for each other right now. I wouldn't know a thing about that. About how it makes you want to scream, or hit someone... or cry.

Joey: You are so blinded by her cover girl looks you wouldn't even noiced if she did. I bet when she offered you that test you didn't fire one ethical comment her way did you? It's just your friends who have to sit here and... and suffer through the Dawson Leery morality play. Bleach Blonde hoe bag is willing to put out...need not audition.
Dawson: Are you finished?
Joey: I could go on.

Goofs

• When Pacey comes to Joey drunk, he trips and falls, bringing down with him all of his and Andies old memories, and you get a clear shot of everything going into the water, but magically the next shot in that direction, there is one surviving object, the picture of Pacey and Andie on the edge of the dock. Gee, I guess it must have jumped out of the water all by itself back onto the dock.
• At the start of the episode, at Dawson's bedroom window, who's holding the apple? When the camera's on Eve, she's got it. When we view Dawson, he's holding it. Intentional or just really bad directing?
• How did Andie get the test? She left the test room before Dawson did.
• When the anchorwoman mentions the book Cracking the PSATs on TV and Andie holds up her book and says, "One step ahead of you, baby," the book actually reads "Cracking the Sat and Psat". The "Cracking the..." series is published by The Princeton Review.
• Jack takes his PSATs but he's a year older than the rest of the group. In "Rest in Peace" his father says he is 17.
• When Andie supposedly stole the PSAT test answers, where would she have put it? She didn't have a bookbag or purse or anything with her before the fire drill, and she didn't have the test or a bag after it.

Notes

• How Eve got the answers in the first place remains a big mystery. Do you really think ETS is going to send an advance copy of the PSAT's to any school? It's possible but the episode never explains how.
• What happened to the necklace Dawson gave to Joey at the end of last week's episode? Joey wasn't wearing it.
• It's interesting that Dawson criticizes Pacey for not taking Andie back after she begged for forgiveness when he did the exact same thing to Joey two episodes ago when she asked for forgiveness.
• Ever notice that everytime Jen is at cheerleading practice, she never wears shorts? She's always wearing pants. Don't you think that she would get hot?
• Felicity fans may note that the episode playing was a first season episode, in which Felicity rewrites Ben's English paper, without him knowing.
• The reason for the Dumbo stuffed animal that Pacey got Andie was that in "Tamara's Return", Pacey and Andie had a dicussion about the movie Dumbo, and they agreed how much they liked it.
• Eve is always tempting Dawson with evil things, like sex and in this episode, cheating. It's like how Eve in the Bible tempts Adam with the apple. The analogy with the apple and the Knowledge of Good and Evil in the middle of the episode made that even more clear.
• When Eve and Dawson are hiding under the table in the Library, they are talking much louder than a whisper. The security guard would have to be deaf not to have heard them.
• What is "fug" anyway? Is that the wirters way of making a joke, or is that the closest they can come on network TV to saying the f-word?
• At the very end of the episode, when Dawson and Pacey walk out of the test, Dawson says that if they are going to beat the crap out of each other, it should at least be about a girl. This could be foreshadowing to when Pacey and Joey hookup later in the season.
• Here's a press release of the company that made Andie's flash cards:

  In-A-Flash Study Cards to be Featured on Teen Drama Dawson's Creek Products From an Omaha-Based Company Shown on The Warner Brothers Network' OMAHA, Neb., Oct. 12 /PRNewswire/ -- Study cards from In-A-Flash, an Omaha-based educational company that produces study cards for the ACT, SAT, and PSAT tests for high school students, will be featured on an upcoming episode of the highly rated teen drama Dawson's Creek. The episode of Dawson's Creek airing Wednesday, October 13, 1999 at 7 p.m. CDT titled "None Of The Above," will feature many scenes of the Dawson's Creek stars preparing for the PSAT test. To help them study, they will be using In-A-Flash study cards. Some of the stars using these cards will be Michelle Williams (Jen), Kerr Smith (Jack), and Meredith Monroe (Andy). Dawson's Creek, the highly successful teen drama series on the Warner Brothers channel, tells the poignant stories of teenagers growing up in the rapidly changing world, as it focuses on the relationships of six high school juniors in a small coastal town in Massachusetts. In-A-Flash produces study cards that have helped students nationwide raise their test scores. Each flash card uses a unique cartoon illustration to help students retain critical knowledge and be able to recall it at test time. The In-A-Flash card system was developed by educators and test preparation professionals. In-A-Flash is a division of REDSTONE Communications, an Omaha-based marketing communications firm. For more information on In-A-Flash cards contact 800-466-7564 or visit inaflash.com .

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